Covid19: Day 26 – I’m not okay

Dear Diary

There are a lot of social media gurus/life coaches telling us all how we can best use our time to better ourselves during this lockdown. From encouraging us to start a new business (in this time of strife?), or get fit for summer, to calling us slackers if we don’t do something great, it’s all a bit much.

It would be fantastic if we could all rise to the occasion but some of us are struggling with this strange new reality.

Since the lockdown I’ve been trying to write something. Anything. I’ve had Scrivener opened on my work in progress begging me to add just a few words. I’ve had Microsoft Word opened begging me to write a blog post.  I started writing ‘six things to binge watch whilst on lockdown’ and only got as far as number one before abandoning my efforts.  It’s hard to focus.

For me it’s like going through the five stages of grief. I’ve done the “this shit can’t be real” (denial) stage. I experienced some anger over the stupidity of hoarding and I was dancing around the depression stage but found that writing down my feelings keeps me from tipping over.  The truth is, given the givens, even if I sat through the whole lockdown and did nothing constructive, it would be okay.

It’s one thing to be a fan of post-apocalyptic films and TV shows, it’s a whole different ball game when you’re walking down near deserted streets seeing foxes rummaging through bins without a care in the world. Deliberately crossing the road to avoid coming into contact with the person walking towards you, scared that they might want to talk to you or worst spit on you. Who can you trust?

The world is a little crazy right now. If you can get your head around exercising daily, reading that stack of books you’ve been meaning to or even writing that book you know is in you, then yes! Have at it! But if, you can’t right now, that’s okay too.

At a time like this, it’s okay to not be okay.

No quote tweeting, but if you’re a ‘life coach’ who’s on here implying people are losers if they aren’t learning a new skill/building a brand while on lockdown, maybe stop. People have challenges you know nothing about. Sometimes getting through something is more than enough.

— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) April 3, 2020